So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
can you wear a superman outfit if we ever have sex?
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
The only person who has seen my penis more than that girl, is that girl's sister.
I owe you 20 bucks. My blood work did show liver damage.
You climbed into the Suite next to us at the game so you could steal the half eaten hot dog someone had left on the table. That high.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
We can talk about your dick in my throat after a decision is made, this is my hair we're talking about. .. shit's important.
He said I could stop sending ass pics now and just say hello. I'm not sure if that means he's no longer interested, or that he's a gentleman??
It's 7:30pm and we've already lost someone and had to run from the cops. What the fuck did you put in the punch?
Masturbating to the DNC live stream. Not my proudest moment
Ryan. I woke up. At the neighbors house. And by the neighbors. I mean the ones to the north. The ones that hate us. Please call me. I am so confused and you are gone
At the neighbors house?! Like in it or outside???
In it on the fucking couch. No idea how i got here.
rowboat hit a rock. taking on water. going down fast. bring cheerios.
aye aye capn
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
Randomize
