Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
I wouldn't call it sex. It's like when you put a plug in a socket half way. It's not all the way in but it still turns on the light.
at least after i hook up with someone i have the decency to ignore them
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
He gave me his number and said the usual call whenever you need someone but then was like... or just call me.
You would pick up a guy in AA.
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
He wants a "vagina fling" before he commits to dick for life. I'm gonna allow it.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
Hi darlin, what are you doing tonight?
.... Things I will not be proud of
Randomize
