Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
YOU CAN MICROWAVE POPTARTS!?!??!
best part he said "i like your tattoo" as he walked into the room, stood right there looking at me, naked on top of his friend
he prob just wants to be friends and here i am photoshopping our kids
That's science, my friend. Boner science.
You kept trying to throw the grocery cart off the balcony.
my boss just accepted "because it's 4/20" as a legitimate reason to take Friday off
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
I WAS JUST SITTING HERE BEING SNIFFED BY ODD WOMEN FOR A SOLID 5 MINUTES. My face was a twist of utter fear and confusion...
spending my first valentines day single in 3 years blazed and eating heart shaped brownies i bought myself. WHO NEEDS A MAN.
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
Packing for college has become a game of where did I hide my sex toys.
Eh, I don't question what my penis likes. It just does what it does.
I can always count on you to keep my boobs honest
Who the hell tries to steal eggnog.
Randomize
