You drink too much
No, I drink just the right amount - too often.
You should dream of me :)
I'm going to dream of single life.
used his ipod to set the mood...1st song was livin on a prayr 2nd song was disco stick
i expected more from guys that i meet at the jersey shore.
You nicknamed her "lazy eye" and were screaming across the bar at her to buy you a drink...
he had two deer mounted on his dorm room wall with panties and bras hanging from the antlers... i cant believe i contributed to bambi's headgear...
I know what youre going to say and vodka only explains half of my sitation
I feel like jumping into a breast pit right now. Like the old school ball pits at mcdonalds.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
apparently i tried to facetime the drunk bus last night, that's probably why we had to walk back to campus
Drunk ass.
I don't understand why you aren't on this trip all I do is smoke weed drink beer and get fingered
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
This mustache is awesome. I can't pass by a mirror without looking in it and thinking damn, I'd like to give that guy a handy.
My moral compass cannot be waived by two measly bloody Mary's
I want to be her friend more than I want to fuck her boyfriend.
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