Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
I wish I could google chicago male strippers on my work computer but I don't feel like talking to HR today
i love how cold weather makes identifying sluts easier. is it below freezing? is she wearing a tube top? she's easy.
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
I just saw a guy in front of the courthouse giving himself a sobriety test and fail it...this can't end well
i was surprised by the severity of his small dick condition
if I see a bottle of vodka right now I'll probably throw up gum I swallowed when I was a kid
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
She's working this semester. Her dad saw he was listed as 'the atm' on her phone and cut off tuition for three months.
I just had a flashback to the three of us in the bed and me shouting AM I THE BIGGEST OR LITTLEST SPOON?!
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
No. It's going to be "I'm mad that it took you so long to get over here" angry sex.
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
