Dear everyone that texted me last night wondering where i was. i ended up face down blacked up drunk before i made it to the party. My bad
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
Seriously though, we're going to drink and watch Survivor first one to puke gets voted off the island
he ran me a hot bath. i thought i was in a pot and was going to be eaten. i was strangely ok with this
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
You know why I moved here? No public intoxication law. A cop just helped me from my bent over vomit pose, asked if I was ok, and gave me a ride home.
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
I'd like to introduce you to my friend, Moderation. Enjoy each other's company this weekend.
Your friend and I already don't get along
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
I'm 50% okay with that amount of body contact... plus/minus 7% based on where blood may flow.
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
And remember people can't hear you kick ass in space
Maybe if you would fuck your boss you would get string cheese too
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
Randomize
