is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
I am at the point in my high where i now know/understand chinese.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
she's in the bathroom. spitting in the trashcan. not throwing up. just spitting and singing bad romance by lady gaga.
thatta girl
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Aaaaand my mom is wearing jeggings...
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
It's the warm chocolate goeyness of a brownie combined with the heavenly taste of weed-smell... Why have I never done this before?
I can't even spell what he said he was on. And I had to call 4 people before someone had heard of it.
I've never SEEN someone give negative fucks before. It's actually rather impressive. I want to study under them.
I had to fake it. He was punching my vagina like it owed him money and enough was enough.
You mentioned his name and i threw up a little.
Got everyone out of my house, somehow managed to put all my lawn furniture back, puked in my sink, and cleaned it up all while black out drunk before my parents came home. Successful night.
Randomize
