it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
well, it ended with me crying outside the strip club saying i don't want to be 21 anymoree. i'd say it was a great 21st birthday.
I think a used vibrator from amazon.com is a great valentines day gift foe my ex.
I just feel like everything is too perfect
He's probably a serial killer or chronic masturbator
Or both. Which is common
The golf course isn't that incognito for sex.
Would you like to partake in getting high as fuck with your best friend and then proceeding to cry over the shit head guys we deal with?
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
So I just bought e from my sophomore home ec teacher. How's your weekend going?
Thanks for that golden cinnamony goodness that flowed from your fake tits last night haha
But what I'm actually thinking about is how everyone except me had sex on my bed this weekend and now I'm just sleeping in it with a 7 foot tall blue panda
Ran into my statistics professor at the bar, he chugged a car bomb and yelled "x bar mothfucker!". On average I'm loving this PhD program.
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
you should probably call the Bronx Zoo in the morning to formally apologize
its the right thing to do
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize
