i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
well we can cross tagging a chick in a movie theatre off the list of things to do before we die
Note: fake nails and fingering anus.... Not a good idea
He's got a southern drawl and a lisp. I'm getting mindfucked right now.
Just saw a cougar do the walk of shame. She asked housekeeping where the fastest elevator was.
She wants to go as a facebook "like" for halloween, but right now her costume looks more like the hamburger helper hand with broken fingers.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
Those were some damn good pancakes you made last night.
Dude I've been in FL since Monday.
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
With my son watching me, I pulled down my pants and shit in her trash can.
The lady at the front desk wished you a happy hangover.
Third time this week I've caught co workers dry humping. Quarantine really changes people's priorities.
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