i don't like sucking hair
My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
it appears as though my vagina has gotten the best of me again
Serious question...Is it possible to get a DUI on a kayak?
When we were eating pie last night, I dropped some, and not only did you not judge me for far surpassing the 5 second rule, you let me use your foot to sock mop with. You're a good friend.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
I woke up to Dragon Ball Z playing in Portuguese and a donut shish-kebab~ed on a dick in my face.
I already plan to donate my brain to science so they can attempt to fully understand the complexities of my existence
Can we climb Your roof?
No bitch its 2am go home.
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
RESIST THE DICK
thats like telling me to resist drinking water. impossible.
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
THREE MINUTES! THREE MINUTES PAST MIDNIGHT I STSRT HEARING CHRISTMAS MUSIC ON THE OVERHEAD PA SYSTEM!!!
Randomize
