just leaving uw hospital. they thought i had franzia-induced appendicitis. whaaaaat
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
I'm in the bar bathroom about to pass out. But it's ok cause I set my alarm to go off for last call
Just threw up in the waiting room. I can't believe I have to switch dermatologists again.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Why do I love Florida? Because I just quit my job because it's too pretty a day to go to work and I'm going to the beach to eat seafood and drink beer.
Things i learned at work today: do not put mayonaise on a tattoo, it will get infected.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
Can't beat it when the local bar sends you off with a loaf of bread on the way out the door.
To be honest, the last time I saw him he had a jesus costume on telling people to pray to his bible.
So he's at the chuch?
No, hooters.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
Had a one night stand and didnt remember the guys name until he started sending me poems in the mail.
Randomize
