Have you learned any life lessons?
I like big butts and I cannot lie.
Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
I'm thankful she wil die Alone. And I'm thankful I slept wiht her cousin. And brother.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
I had a dream that we erected a stage in our living room for "impromptu performances" how can we make this a reality?
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
He's under the table sobbing because he doesn't live in a taco if you ever get him this high again I will stab you
Is he the circus guy or the bi-curious street preacher?
Did we really just set fireworks off in a cemetery? Or was that a dream?
I think so and I think we were sober.
Do you remember making out with the dude in the back of my cab last night?? You said his mustache tickled your tongue.
Alright if I email the police department asking for my mug shot do you think they will email it to me
I'm asking you this because you're my dad....is coke a drug I should try?
i think i'm just going to start having sex with his brother, he's much hotter and it would definately be less illegal.
you were shouting "me peeing on him is the closest he'll EVER get to my vagina!"
Randomize
