You know how britney does the hair flip too much in her new videos? Thats me right now
I just broke up with my girlfriend lets go find strippers that need rent money.
I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
My toast was "here's to being positive, and testing negative... Cheers!"... after that chick gagged on her shot, everyone knew.... slut.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
I just had a flashback of me saying "I'm not ready to be a deadbeat mom" lastnight.
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Why were my jeans in the freezer of the mini fridge, and how long have they been in there? On another note, I found my teacher's ID badge.
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
She's like the King Midas of sexual confusion. Everything she touches turns to gay.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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