Denmark girl wants me to go out but i remembered shes a raging whore with extremely questionable morals. Not feelin that tonight
we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.
You know you're wathing too much reality TV when you start adding commentary to every day life.
Pretending to care about her feelings is becoming a full time job
I have another pimple on my ass cheek.
I'll be there in 10 minutes.
My roommate is trying to suck beer out of the rug.
Fran... I put my tongue in somebody's gage hole last night.
Boats looked like robot pelicans and time was slow and now im on wipe out
Every time I see him I get horny. I can't help it!
Just stop. You're making other wives look bad. We are all starting to hate you.
I hooked up with a lesbian tonite. Top 2 valentines experiences of all time.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
Ps I think male models just broke down outside or maybe gay German sex travelers
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
i ate her out in full view of all her roomates. the word awkward doesnt even cover it.
Randomize
