I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
You should see the damage i did to the apartment last night. So many broken things and butter sticks stuck to windows.No memorys
in the middle of giving him head in the backseat of my car he taps me on the shoulder, opens the door, throws up three times and then proceeds to tell me how amazing i am.
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
no, throwing your underwear at it is not the solution to everything
Too much alcohol and too many lesbians. I can officially say I have regrets now. At least that's something.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
Drunk girl in a bikini just tried to bite my face, it's officially spring break
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
Yeah then you killed that bottle of Bacardi in under 20 minutes. So much for being an organ donor.
But I did discover that he's totally okay with going down on me while I eat taco bell so that's a plus, right?
I NEED TO TAKE A FUCKING BREAK. MY VAGINA IS SMOKING.
I didn't think you were that drunk until you were trying to rub your foot on my vag under the table at the thai place.
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