11:03 p.m. Whats a lie i you lovn me. Let's cuddle.
didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
you hid your keys in a box of lucky charms because drunk you was apparently going to eat them for breakfast...
Too late, the blunt's already in my cleavage
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
after you left he started opening his bottles by smashing the neck against the edge of the fireplace and pouring beer into his mouth. it was about the manliest thing ive ever seen. its probably how lumberjacks open their beers... if they didnt have their axes handy.
Her son walked into the middle of the living room, took off his diaper, shit on the floor, smiled at me, and walked out, as if nothing happened.
So date night went well?
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
They think I fractured my spine while doing your cousin on concrete.
She ripped her shorts off and yelled "VAGINA TIME!"
Randomize
