Gettin pulled over, can you watch my dog and pay the bils for a while?
Is Jonathan Taylor Thomas a gay? I need you to google search it for me. Its important
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
OMG! Someone dumped chocolate soft-serve in the bathroom! Dibs!
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
5th glass of wine. There's pictures of Jesus everywhere. It's like you're constantly reminded of your sins here.
Saw my boss's vagina at that party. Hung over at work has never been more acceptable
Who the fuck superglued glowsticks to my arm.
Guess I'll put him on my to-do list too. But closer to the bottom since we dated before. That's almost unethical.
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
You need to get laid. You spent last night stumbling through the club pulling couples apart and telling them to leave room for Jesus.
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
I farted in his bed and then in my drunken stupor grabbed hair defanging spray to cover up the stench.
you tried to strip tease your way into canada but got arrested instead. don't worry, your mom doesn't know.
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