Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
i may have used way too many innuedos last night. i scared him off. but really... how could i pass up "stimulus package" and "flacid economy." don't answer that.
I just left the house and 2 chicks are in the kitchen making breakfast. Might want to get up.
I'm up, no shirt, and staring at a breakfast casserole. Who are these girls?
It just feels so wrong throwing away the condoms into her Hello Kitty trashcan
a slip n slide in 50degree weather was the 2nd dumbest thing i have ever done. the 1st was hitting the wooden fence i believed was supposed to "help us stop"
If im going to fail a midterm I might as well be drunk while I do it
You were pretty fucked up... decided playing hopscotch down the stairs was an excellent idea.. it was extremely entertaining
my vagina has been out of service for wayy too long... this semester needs to start like right now
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
I'm riding in a wheelchair, being pulled by a golf cart. You need to be here.
Is it sad that i just saw my moms thumb on the table & i instinctively put mine down cuz i thought she was thumbmaster?
Nearly got hit by a blue bell ice cream truck. Can I count on you to make plenty of puns like "her life was sweet, and so was her death" at my funeral if that was to happen?
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
Well I told him I’ve got the flu....he said he’d wear a condom
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