Things to remember: Girls don't appreciate it when you yell "Beast Mode!" when switching to doggy style.
they had a keg party to fund her abortion.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
ONE NIGHT STAND. You have 27 minutes before the offer expires, so I suggest you hurry.
you should be back in the room by now but just so you know. you passed out at the black jack table and they wheel chaired you out. strip club in about 45 minutes. game face bro.
I woke up this morning next to a stack of saltines & a txt from u saying "do it." it took me a second to remember wat was going on
I'm setting a 12:15 alarm for a taco bell run. Be awake or never wake up again.
You won’t make it to November. A 21st bday and Halloween in the same night has shitshow/ jail written all over it. So I call dibs on that tall guy
I literally just wiped coffee off of the corner of my mouth with my boob because my hands were full. Thought youd be proud. Good morning!
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
Overall a good night - broke my toe giving that cop a blowjob though...so there's that...
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
Randomize
