Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
Transgendered man at work dawning a slutty batman costume. I hate Halloween
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
i hope someone procrastinates by putting up the pics up...
sarah said she can't even post all of hers due to facebook indecency rules
The neighborhood kids rang the doorbell in the middle of my first bong rip to ask if they could use my trampoline for the thirtieth time today...I opened the door and pretended to puke up a shitload of smoke, I have never seen a more terrified group of children
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
What goes on in that head of yours?
Gay sex, for the most part. Why?
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
don't act like you've never hung your towel on your dick after getting out of the shower
So in the middle of making out, he decided to give me a breast exam. God I love dating a doctor. He saved me a $20 copay.
Finally liberated my Star Trek DVD from my booty call's house. Captain Kirk would be so proud.
So if I run into you on the street, I'm supposed to just stop drop and suck your dick?
Randomize
