i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Then I opened the closet and then i found the babies
sorry i interrupted the heart to heart you were having with your bathrobe last night
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
I don't know what part of vegas I'm in but its definately the wrong part
your brother is wearing shin guards in the swimming pool. i have a feeling that this happens often
She's drunk as hell locked up I. The bathroom with my shoes where do I go from here
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
All I know is when I checked my phone this morning google translate was open with "help the cow ate my robot" translated to French
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
Need to find a Santa hat to fit my penis, he deserves to be festive too.
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
Omg dude take a shower. You'll feel like god washed away all the sinful shit we did last night.
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