You know how you thought that you put on a condom last weel?
yea
turns out that you did...and i just found it.
I was thinking Sara Jessica Parker was hot. That high.
they just started filling water ballons with vodka.
on my way.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Hey it happens. Think of it this way- you didn't wake up in jail, your face wasn't inexplicably busted and you still have all your teeth. In this group of friends, you're on top!
Guess who is playing his new drum set when his roommate gets home to teach her a lesson about binge drinking to the point of being taken to the emergency room?
im just laying in bed, eating, getting fat, enjoying eating and getting fat, thinking about how i will probably have to get a fat boyfriend.
do you think eating a burger while having sex counts as multitasking skills?
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
Hey know anyone who wants 58 lbs of whole frozen chickens for a couple bowls?
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
Randomize
