you wouldn't even come home last night... Dead to me
Never write on a napkin "my face, your boobs" with your phone number and give it to a girl. Just a tip of the day from my nightly experiences lol.
We need to hang out more often
she's walking around the room telling people she can make the room move with her mind and then she shakes her head really fast yelling 'see?!'
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
Just saved her as "new hostess that randy banged" ...I forgot her name
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
is it too early in the day to continue our conversation about penis shapes?
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
It was about the point the universe collapsed in on itself and I was a singularity of insanity that I realized I was tripping balls.
YOU CAN'T GET A TATTOO BECAUSE OF KPOP FANFICTION. THAT'S NOT HOW LIFE WORKS
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
Blacked out and showed everyone my nudes. They toasted to my nudes, and I got an outstanding ovation.
Road head absolutely translates. That's the beauty of road head... It's so portable!
Just renamed the subject of my sex list on my phone "grocery list" just in case anyone comes across it
Why do my weekends always degenerate into using my little brothers childrens board games for drinking games?
Randomize
