Are you dead
Yes
Oh man
Someone fed me too many chicken nuggets and sexed me too hard
she looks like someone took a bunch of spare parts and glued them all on one face. it's quite horrifying.
Don't worry, there is no such thing as a fat, old or ugly blow job.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
Dude, just paid my sister in vicodin to go out and buy me a slushie.
There comes a time in a man's life when he's almost thirty he just needs to stop watching Degrassi. This is that time.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
I may or may not have just sent the bartender a pic of me in my slutty cheerleader costume with the caption "rah rah ree, gimme yo d"
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
I miss my teeeeeeeeth. They're in a bag in my hand.
Why the fuck are you playing with legos?
Why the fuck are you questioning me?
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
sam was dropping a deuce next to me. wrote me a note that said "glad we shared this experience." passed it under the wrong stall. the other guy picked it up. that's all I know so far.
Randomize
