lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Is it weird for a girl to post pictures of her dildo no facebook?
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
so what if he's got a new girlfriend. the guy i'm fucking has an english accent. i win.
he/she has shaved legs and makeup on. but a spare tire stomach, high socks with high heels...a wig and glasses. and still talked like a man. it was a nightmare scenario
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
Sorry, they don't make maternity Power Ranger suits...
If Anthony Weiner can get in trouble for sexting 2 or 3 girls I dunno how politicians will make it in 10 years.
Lol I would vote for a guy that is trying to be a senator that has a viral video of him motorboating a topless chick
I tried to celebrate Halloween, Thanksgiving, Hannukah, and New Years all in one night.
Fuck you and your widespread penis snapchat
Yeah,I'm just gonna keep fucking other guys til this idiot figures out he loves me.
Buying a new bed right now. My options are limited because I need to be able to be tied to it.
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
Randomize
