I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
Yes I want to fuck your friends but it's out of respect and love for you.
I knew he cared when I got his text "happy birthday to the girl who gives phenomenal head"
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
I posted my balls on ericas instagram. It got 17 likes.
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
Watching her eat just hurts me
U can find me on my couch hungover eatin tuna evaluating my life
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
She just left someone a voicemail saying 'you better not have plans Saturday night, cause I'm going to sit on your face.'
I'm excited for you as you venture towards new drug experiences
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
Randomize
