Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
we were having sex in the shower and he dropped me. try explaining THAT to your concerned little brother
I think the secretary can hear it when I fart in the bathroom, how do you think she feels about that?
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
??I have an official piece of documentation saying you are banned from Las Vegas.
A beer is a heart your wish makes!!!
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
You grabbed your house keys, threw them at the door and asked, "did it open?"
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
He stopped mid sex to pour wine in my mouth...
Marry him.
I just gotta say that I feel so much better now that I got some. I mean I feel like a normal functioning adult ready to contribute to society.
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
oh and i figured out why we kept smelling vomit. ive got vomit on my socks. putting the heater on my feet was not the best of ideas.
Randomize
