even in my darkest moments, having another person eat my jizz would make me smile
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
The prescription for my birth control just blew away in the wind on my way back from the health center. It's like god wants me to get pregnant
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
I AM SENDING THIS TEXT MESSAGE SO I DON'T LOOK AT HIM. THANK YOU FOR RECEIVING IT.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
They have a genuine stripper pole secured to the floor of their living room. I am thoroughly take advantage of it. I've made $5 so far. Why don't more places have poles??!
I walk in and my mom has a Christian workout program playing. It's like, gospel music with an "electronic" beat to go with it. And then they try to save your soul at the end. I hate being home.
The three of us were sitting silently in my dining room at 4:30 am, half drunk, eating cold spaghetti and listining to death metal. I need a fucking cigarette.
The thing about online classes is the prof can't tell this mug is full of beer.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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