Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
No, you dont understand, he literately fucked me into a new hairstyle, quite nice too.
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
On the brightside though, I found the motivation to clean my shower, it was right underneath my need to masturbate in said shower.
New development. Drinking at work is so easy and awesome I might have to do it everyday.
Me and your penis are best friends. You don't know it, but I whisper my secrets whenever I give you blowjobs. We even have a secret handshake. We can't be separated from each other. We just can't.
Technically he's married but he says it's "not like that" even tho his wife lives with him. Not sure if I believe him but I'm sleeping with him anyway.
We realized tonight that we have to get advice about guys from you because you're our only straight male friend that neither of us has slept with.
I just remembered that last night I seriously contemplated swallowing the cap to my toothpaste
I just drank beer out of an old Vicodin bottle hoping to catch some residue. That's how finals week is going
I'm fine with our borderline lesbian behavior.
I'm shotgunning a meatball sub and watching flip or flop. i have reached a new level of singledom.
I managed to break 3 nails and loose my stockings, but I made 87 dollars at the strip club. I asked where I could find an application on the way out.
I just remembered I casually gave you a tour of the house after we boned...lol
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
Randomize
