How, after 24 years of life, did I manage to revisit breastmilk
you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
i just wish he would text me so i could ignore his text and show him how little i care anymore
We'll make it into fun. If I can make wii bowling into a drinking game, I can make studying spanish into a sex game.
at home by myself drinkin the left over champagne from my party... who says my birthday has to end?
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
What baked good do you think says thanks for being a great tutor, lets bang?
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
I think it says something about my sobriety when I don't notice a Taco Bell wrapper stuck to my ass until I'm in the shower...
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
Btw I'm already known as the drunk roommate. Don't know if that's a success or a failure seeing as it hasn't even been a week since I've been here
I'm at that point in my life where keeping an extra pair of underwear in my purse is normal.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
Honestly the prospect of dick really lifts a girl's spirits
Randomize
