I dont get it-she has sex with me but wont be my facebook friend?
im trying to catch a child molester. call you later.
Oh my god! She wrote the word ''hi'' in HAIR on the shower wall. What the fuck?!
Theres a high probability there will be two hot men waiting on you in your bed when you get home for lunch.
There was booze on his face and I wanted it. I'm not sorry.
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I told her the party couldn't handle my playlist LAZERBAWLS and I was right. Cops in the basement, orgy in the kitchen, jousting in the living room.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
I'm sorry I keep having sex wth your friends. I'm done, for real. Unless cole is interested. Other than that, I'm done.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
i guess she just walked over ass naked and peed on his laptop. gonna call an over price on that drunk sex.
You ran outside mistaken the snow for sand and started screaming "WHERES TH BEACH"
Randomize
