I accidentally had phone sex last night
I have no idea. I woke up naked on someones toilet locked in the bathroom with two baby kittens.
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
Please collect your boy friend. He semi-passed out on the couch and trying to grab bums as people walk by. Anyone's bum, he's not choosy.
Can't keep a straight face around her after she asked me to "make fuck to her."
All I am going to say is this: I woke up with lots of bruises on my knees from running around on all fours being a 'dinosaur'. Either girls night in went terribly wrong or terribly right.
just ran into my drill sergeant from basic 4 years ago. gonna take him home and have him fuck me at the cadence of quick time.
Please just help me figure out where the bruise on my face came from.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
We hotboxed his bathroom. going to be a good night
Hotbox went wrong - smoke sets off fire alarm. Firefighters coming
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
