is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
I swear some just paged for more cock rings over the intercom.
I can't tell if I'm getting better at doing my online spanish hw drunk or if my teacher is just grading on creativity. Either way that senoritas gettin an applebees gift card when i graduate.
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
Somewhere in this city is a lost rubber penis that needs to find its way back home
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
party tonight. bring as many traffic cones as you can find. we need to section off the blackout drunks way better this time
He's gonna do me a solid for doing her a solid. It's like pay it foward. But with sex.
Terrible idea I love it
Why am I not drinking beer at 8:26am is the question
Just letting you know that while you peed your pants in that guys jeep, The orgasm I had made my hair fall out... Good morning.
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