This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
I decided that I do the same thing when i'm drunk with every guy who has a girlfriend...lecture them on how bad cheating is, then hook up with them. I'm like good cop, bad cop.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
Well, practice makes perfect. Let's start playing Eye of the Tiger and do a blowjob training montage.
he's home with a concussion now...but apparently i'm still the highlight of his freshman year
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
He just showed up with a bottle of wild turkey a half a can of coke and some marshmallows yelling "gobble gobble bitches" my roommates hate my cousin
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
my new years resolution to eat more toast and mastrubate more often is going well so far.
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Think I have the only job where I can be naked in a room with my manager at work. Apart from hookers
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
Randomize
