Oprah is sooooo fat. I can't even concentrate on Mackenzie Phillips talking about banging her dad
my roommate's gf just broke up with him and hes in his room crying and listening to coldplay while beating off to pictures of her...
We had sex on the hood of my car and broke the windshield.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
drunk...on the white house tour...security is staring. this will not end well.
I told them I was gay and asked them to pass the pie. I ruined pumpkin pie for grandpa.
Hey for future reference vodka can not be substituted for water when shaving your legs
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
FYI...Jose likes Shamrock shakes better than Jack
I drank it. I drank the beer from '78. I drank my bday beer, I drank my soul
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
I'll have to start mass sending dong pics to get the recognition I deserve
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
Randomize
