Well you will be happy to know that aaron carter hit on me
no, i'm not a lesbian.. i just really want to fuck you while drinking, thats normal in a friendship.
When you gave me the first bj i thought 'yep, this girl is going to do great things with her life'
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
Woke up in an unfamiliar pair of underwear, running shoes but no socks, and a cowboy hat. Thank you crown royal
I don't know bro, all I could remember is that he kept saying hallelujah and calling that girl Slutimus Prime
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Word of advice, don't put your jar if peanut butter in the microwave, blue fire comes out
I can measure my amount of vomit in solo cups.
I may or may not already be in your hot tub when you get home. I have a key to your house and no shame.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
Using my graduation announcement box as a table to roll a blunt on. I've official stopped giving a shit about senior year
We just fucked like crazy and now I'm dipping chips in macaroni & cheese. I feel completely accomplished. This may be the best day ever.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
His sisters are going to have a heyday finding all those condoms in their bunk beds.
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