Well listen chief - never again do i want the scenario of going to the ER totally naked and partially drunk to b a possibility.
Is it bad that when my prof gave examples of "stalking" behavior, I either have done or would do most of them?
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
Wash that dress asap. You laid down on the kitchen floor and tried to sweep the floor with your body.
That's fuckin bs. I had the bouncers beat by 30 yards til that dumbshit on the moped stopped in front of me.
You know me. Don't need roses, just dick and food.
i was staring at her drunk thinking "shes at least a four"
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
So this is where people who peaked in high school come to drink?
Meanwhile I'm working a fucking flute workshop and I'm one high c away from shoving a flute up the asshole of the next passerby
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
The dude is a cop how would I ever date a cop I wouldn't be able to talk about the first TWENTY-SEVEN years of my life!
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
Randomize
