Well apparently he's into motor boating.
just walked out of chelsea's house and saw cameron slapping his dick against her car. cant even make this shit up if i tried.
So guy #2, the dancer, is programmed into my phone under the name H.uy. His number- 11 digits. I should have stopped drinking.
I hope as the only other living being in this apartment you can explain to me why the toilet was full of cheerios this morning.
I'm pretty sure we've had sex a bunch more times than we've hugged. So hugs are weird when they happen.
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
your ability to fuck hot guys even when you go out in sweats amazes me
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
This girl has a second refrigerator that she uses JUST for liquor, her kitchen chairs are kegs AND she can grill. I'm not coming back.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
You should know I just got pulled aside by TSA because they found a bottle of Bud Light in my backpack... Thanks for that...
Not enough. Tell the person next to you to give you their drink. I give you permission. And then chug it. Be a hero tonight.
It's that "make a Pringle and Twinkie sandwich" kind of depression.
Mandatory 420 Adventure Time.
This is why we're friends.
Sorry for drunkely attacking your best friend with a bow and arrow then loudly crying myself to sleep....PMS?
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