So I've officially decided that I AM that drunken mistake that girls hate themselves for in the morning.
She told me she cured her bulemia by popping hydrocodone after she ate. that way she would be rewarded for not puking. I like the way she thinks
The fact that he grabbed my boob in the middle of the conversation shows something needs to change
He bought me shots at the bar as his way of of paying me back for Plan B
its 4am and she invited me over to split a 'romantic bowl of frosted flakes'...really dude?...what do you think she's trying to say?...she better not be kidding about the frosted flakes though.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
So stoned i forgot i was in bed
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
I WAS CONCIEVED IN THE BACK OF MY CAR. THATS HOW OLD THIS CAR IS.
...how and why.
PARENTS ARE MAGIC.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
I sleep better at night when I win things. I never really weep for others.
Why would you call when you knew I'd be having sex!?
Why would you answer?
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
Don’t judge me
Some of us don’t have access to dick on a constant basis
Is it wrong to want to use the Dark Web to buy Vyvance for legitimate purposes?
Randomize
