The Lord gave Farrah Fawcett 1 wish when she died. She wished that all children in the world would be safe! The Lord granted her wish and killed Michael Jackson.
First shot of my 21st. 11 a.m. in econ class. Success.
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
If I am going to throw out this whole "born again virgin" thing...i'm not going to do it on someone who is less than 5 inches.
i miss our vodka / percocet laundry days.
Cancel that soberness update. I just almost fell down in the security line
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
Fuck you, if it wasn't for us going to the city, she would be using me as a human sex toy all day.
just had to get on my knees to snort an addy off the little sink at the daycare. teacher of the year!
Every time I start to think he's just not worth the trouble, he puts his face down there and I wanna buy him a car
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
I had a threesome last night with my fiance' and our soon to be best man. Everyone is surprisingly chill about it this morning. Is this any indication of what the wedding night will be like?
Randomize
