When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
Reading in my econ of energy textbook about the US' largest oil spill from the 1990's.. guess i can't sell this one back either
It's sad that the best source of heat that I have is my vaporizer.
So can we talk about how we all three made out with the bike taxi driver in lieu of paying him. I'm not even mad, that's resourceful. You know what married girls would have had to do? They'd have had to pay.
just did a beer bong in the shower while i was taking an actual shower its officially football time
Dear Beer Goggles, it's time to see the eye doctor. With love, your biggest fan.
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
Walking out of the bathroom and not knowing you have hand soap on the front of your pants so it looks like you blew a load on yourself really sets the tone for the rest of the week...
I think I'm still drunk...I just gave my empty conditioner bottle a break-up speech before I threw it away.
I pulled a muscle last night drunk dirty snapchatting him
Holy shit I've found my last one night stand in my Gran's knitting club
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
It's a weird kind of sexy when a guy has a bunkbed with his roommate
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