I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
I woke up with a solved rubics cube in my purse
I just got this text "hi this is Julie, I met you last night in the bathroom. You asked me to text you and remind you that you ate an entire lime, because you figured your sober self in the morning would be confused."
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
I did what any insensitive guy would do bought her friends shots and tried to fuck them
Fuck you, you can't judge me til you've smelt my boobs.
Well. Your father was, shall we say, privately surfing the Internet when he found a video of you and Kevin. This was on a very public website honey.
By the way, Kevin! OMG good catch honey!
i know you're upset so i should probs be supportive but i've got nothing in that department. your life suuuuucks
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
2 girls slept in my bed with me. 3 more girls slept on a mattress on my floor. The furthest I got was cuddling. Here's my man card.
It makes no sense at first, you go with it, it's fun and entertaining and then a disaster
he never texted me back from last night. i think brining out the suction cup dildo was a mistake
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
Etiquette question... How do you tell your mother that her nipple is out in her fb profile picture?
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Randomize
