Walk of Shame time yet?
Dude she's 6"2, blonde and on the cheerleading team. I look like Seth Rogen's fatter, unfunny brother. What shame am I supposed to be feeling?
mom and dad are leaving for florida on 4/20, this is a sign
just caught a 10 year old kid staring at my dick next to me in the urinal. i just nodded to him and said yeah, mines bigger little dude. i gotta stop drinking in public....
the spit in my mouth is still 99% not mine.
Soooo, if his status went from married to single and he deleted all the pictures of his kids does that mean he's up for dibbs?
filling out my bracket based on schools with ppl I've hooked up with
And our DD is passed out in the bathtub with the curtain closed. What happened tonight
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
He just kept repeating "not with an octopus" over and over for hours. Soooooo Porn Dare was a succes.
I apparently used the line "I'm a bouncer too so i would know if I were too drunk" then they asked me to leave.
Where the condoms are as broken as my dreams
The sex was so boring I heard the people having sex next door and I wanted to stop just to listen
Ok I'm drunk as fuck already at 529 and this waitress started flirting with me, I wanna bang her for acknowledging my existence
You full on peed your pants then resurrected yourself like Jesus Christ...
She's writing hockey erotica again.
Tell her to pick another team besides ours this time.
Randomize
