i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
other than her wanting kids and me wanting to do drugs,were perfect for each other
Legit I think I might have gotten hepatitis C from licking the window of that last cab.
just when i thought i had forgotten how badthe sex was he comes across campus solely to say hi
Drunk at ten am watching Californication re runs. Being divorced rules.
My new hangover cure is going for a haircut, just so the stylists give me a scalp massage during the shampoo.
That certainly explains the nine times your hair has looked different just this last month alone.
Plus, I've always wanted to drive in rush hour with a huge cock drawn on my hood
The next time you try to drunkenly strip me in public let's make sure it's not anywhere near the daiquiri factory or a group of police officers.
I desperately wanted to wear your shirt.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
How do you nicely stand up a date that you're skipping for a 3sum
Randomize
