So my game is weak??
If your game is "Lets have sex, and maybe pizza" then yes.
She took off her pants and it was like seeing an old friend.
trying to line up a DD for St Pats Day. i guarantee i will put out. or puke and pass out. really its 50/50 at this point.
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
come help me. im curled up in the fetal position on the upper floor of the lib. please bring more caffeine or alcohol
its ok. its hell week the lib is a no judgment zone right now
I cried singing "call me maybe" on the way home from the bar. What the fuck
Dave, I love you but you're barking up the wrong lesbian. You sir are the competition. You don't threesome with competition.
Our 450 pound cab driver smells like McDonalds and sunblock with a touch of vodka. Correction I smell like vodka.
his version of basketball was throwing hot sauce packets down my cleavage at taco bell at 2 am with his buddy.the cashier kept score
You should have totally come, I started watering down vodka with cider. I have lost the sense of taste.
I am too high to deal with coming home to 11 naked people in my living room
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
I cannot believe I accepted his penis into my body.
Randomize
