singing james blunt while drunk. tell me thats not wonderful
Just wondering why in an apartment full of stoners there is half a waffle in the TRASH CAN. get ur shit together man
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
I took a shit in your bathtub. Nothings off limits
Need a travel agent to tell me which countries in Asia have legalized prostitution for New Year. Fireworks would be cool too.
We woke up under the ping pong table holding hands.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Guess who has two thumbs and just fell outta his car and almost peed himself
I just got my hands on some dry ice. How do you feel about coming home to a mystical wizard toilet?
It was just...long. I started around 2. And I think i went to bed around 2. So 12 straight hours? I remember a milkshake and frozen grapes.
Just cried because I'm out of oreos. This post-molly depression can go fuck itself.
I just saw someone dressed as a bear leave your house on a motorcycle. I guess you guys are having a good time.
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
It's not a hangover, it's "slept on a couch with another person and said person moves a lot and is loud"
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
Randomize
