I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
well once we started drinking vodka out of wine glasses there was no turning back
3 things. 1. is this real life 2. my liver hates me 3. keg race tonight
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
You have no idea how pumped I am. I literally plan on dying. You're in my will
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
sitting in the kitchen naked and eating stirfry, random dude left my room saying thanks and gave me a bottle of wine. explain...
I didn't know how wild the party was going to be until one girl brought her pet raccoon
I don't want to get pregnant doggy style. That's sad.
You told your boyfriend he needed to fuck you in the tree because it would make you guys one with nature.
Did he?
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
when your dumb AF ex “accidentally” venmos you $50 and texts you asking for it back..... —sorry I accidentally deleted your number and cashed out
Randomize
