VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Why do fat girls all have such cute faces?
God wants them to get laid too.
i feel like our whole relationship was one big acid trip
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
I'm getting a collar when he gets back in to town! That's like the bdsm equivalent of getting his class ring!
I have no idea what to do with myself since we graduated.
I've just been napping and sexting all day.
I sent my brother over to my ex's to get the rest of my stuff. He comes back SEVEN HOURS LATER, high as fuck without my shit! No loyalty.
I'm in the upstairs bathroom. I went to the bathroom after class and realized this is not a shit I want to have publicly. I ran home. We can go to lunch, just give me a min
My professor congratulated me on turning my assignment in early. I didn't have the heart to tell him I only passed it in early cause my sex plans got canceled for the night.
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize
