do you know mcdonalds refuses to give out large cups of water now? you have to buy a bottle or they give you a small cup. No exceptions.
RUDE.
I said FINE, then I'd like 7 small waters and 2 of those nifty carrying cases to carry about my h2o.
outsmarted mickey deeeees
listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
My leg won't stop wagging. It's like it's congratulating my vagina.
I just did the math, I've had 8 hours of sleep in the last 3 days. Not sure if that means I am dedicated to my sex life or my job...
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
Right, well, that begs the question of where did you get the whip, why are you using it, and why don't you carry one around more often?
You called to teach me about fire safety, meowed a whole bunch, said "I hope you are not on fire" and hung up.
if I'm at school tomorrow just indulge my moment of pity and let me cry on your shoulder
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
If you're still up for that roadtrip, I managed to end up in Louisiana and could use a ride home.
Sorry that I was such a monster last night. It was the drugs, I promise.
I stood in my living room with two beers in my hand asking these said beers if they were going to drink each other. I then insisted that I would drink them and chugged both. Happy Halloween.
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
Don't have sex in a tent there are so many opportunities for infections
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
Randomize
