Dude she let me cum on her face
You have the wrong number I'm the she who let you cum on her face unless some other girl has let you since this morning
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
As payment for all the times you have babysat me while im drunk, im giving you the shorts i stole from the guy i stayed with on friday night. They're clean. Come get em.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
She stopped mid hookup to ask me if we'd be done before Taco Bell closed.
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
So would it be tacky to offer my services as a future attorney as an engagement gift for her?
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
Get the cougar, get the cougar, get the cougar. Act like an injured baby deer. She will either eat you alive or nurse you back to health either way its still sex.
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
How do I say "I want to suck your balls" in a classy but sexy way,
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
Randomize
