So My parents cut me off after I started making blood marys with hienz ketchup
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
who has not yet felt my sugrcially enhanced boobs. HurryI am at the bnar and it is 1:15 am
They got a 10 foot tall beach ball from the roof of a McDonalds. Get the fuck over here.
Is it too early to say this year has been a blur?
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
I dunno I mean I feel like I owe everyone an apology except the two people I punched in the face
Let's go get coffee and handcuffs.
But of course I'm in. After all, what fun would the holidays be without trying to find the perfect gift to impress someone you've never met, but need the approval of??
Dude, I'm thinking today is Single as Fuck Friday because that's how I'm feeling
Cant get off the floor. Need more beer. Send help.
PLEASE LET MY BIRD FUCK YOUR BIRD
I'm naked and there are two trees and a yield sign
Be right there
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